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Sunday, December 20, 2009

Unchristmassy Christmas???

Its been over a week since my last update, it's not that i havent had stuff to write about, I AM JUST TOO LAZY TO TYPE! I honestly wouldnt mind a volunteer PA that i could dictate my posts to. Maybe that's what i should ask Santa for instead of my page long wishlist.

Anyways it's the holidays and i'm not feeling Christmassy yet, if i was back in Nig, i would probably have left Lagos for PH, would have sat down with my siblings to snicker at my Mum's "assorted" Christmas decor. At Christmas my house often looks like its been decorated by a schizophrenic dwarf, all that low hanging garish christmas garb. We hardly have the heart to tell my mother they make the house look awful, well sometimes we do and she goes on and on about it being her house and she can decorate it as she pleases, either that or she asks you to buy her a 20grand christmas tree. So we often let that sleeping dog lie.

It's been ages since we had one of those big family christmases, everyone would sleep over and then by 6 we'd be up, the boys freezing drinks, killing the goat and the chicken (threatening the dog too) and the girls washing a ton of rice in this big pot you could cook us all in. For the rest of the day, the house would be like a soup kitchen with people trawling in and out, from neighbours, to family friends, to villagers in town for christmas and before you know it the ton of rice would be gone before we even had a taste. Not that we really minded cos as kids then everybody else's mother's food tasted better than yours or maybe it was just longthroat.

There was this thing my neighbourhood kids used to do, we'd make a list, we used to call it a "promise book", with all we wanted for christmas and then take it round to older people who would sign it either promising to buy something on the list for us or give us some money towards it. Those were the times, now i have decided to compare a typical 8year old Neo promise book with her 25 year old counter part.

7 year old Neo
Hausa Slippers
Barbie Diary
Disco light canvass
Roller skates
Jansport backpack
Toy cooking set S
Darling curls braid (usually to Mother) Mulberry bag

24 year old Neo
500 pound ASOS voucher
Blackberry Storm 2
Samsung 12.2MP camera with smile detection
Converse All Star Light Ox
Lolita Lempicka perfume
14" Brazillian weave

I like to think i havent changed much, just advanced with the times. Lol. You know the best part about my wishlist? Wishes do come true, Santa: I believe!

Anyways i'm spending christmas at my friend's just me, another friend, my friend and her two sisters. Plenty of estrogen abi? My flatmates have all gone to their homes and i miss them, well not so much them as their familiar noises and smells (cigarette smoke in the corridors) We werent the whole "oh-we're-the-best-flatties-ever!" but we did get along. Plus i didnt get to see the Taiwanese guy before he left, hope he sha brings me back some of that pineapple cake he gave me the other time. Anyways i ramble. School is deathly quiet save the now familiar sound of luggage tires rolling along the concrete. Sigh.

This week promises to be fun, its my friends birthday on Tuesday and we have lotsa stuff planned, a trip to seaworld, dinner, paintballing (i hear those things sting like mad, must not get shot!) and ice skating at Hyde Park (i plan to cheer them from the sidelines, last one was not fun! Nothing fun about falling flat on ur ass so many times u start to look feeling on ur cheeks) Details coming soon, but in the very likely event i do not blog before then MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAVE A WONDERFUL NEW YEAR IN ADVANCE.

P.S: If you havent, please go see Law Abiding Citizen, my mouth was literally open the entire time. I loved it and not just bcos i got to see Gerard Butlers butt! But oh what a butt!

Friday, December 11, 2009

That Four letter word in Red!

What did you think? Love? Nah, that one doesnt get me as excited as this one. I love a sale. Its not just because its cheaper because for me when i really love something and i can just about squeeze it i'll buy it, instead of stalking the shop to see if it has gone on sale. I love to shop, riffling through sales racks is like a treasure hunt and sometimes you find a real treasure!

I decided to do a post about sale, shopping and (most) women the other day, i was in traffic and just staring out the window when i saw this men's shop doing a massive closing down sale. Everything was 10 pounds and i mean everything and there were huge sale signs everywhere, some of the displays were even outside, i could even see this nice puffer jacket and i was like What!!! Strangely though, the store wasnt that full, there were just a couple of guys milling about, some would stop, look at the display and just continue walking. I couldn't believe it, infact i almost got off the bus just out of loyalty to the big red SALE sign. Why are men so retail-challenged (for lack of a better word)? Dont you feel the thrill from shopping? I even love the anxiety of buyer's remorse cos anytime i feel it, all i have to do is take out those lovely shoes, try them on and do a Beyonce in front of the mirror to remind myself why i fell in love with them in the first place.

Anyways, back to the point, i imagined that this was a store that sold stuff for women on a massive SALE like that. There was traffic on that road right? It wouldnt have compared to the one that would have occured if indeed that had been the case. Women love a SALE, a bargain. We love to buy cheap nice stuff and then gloat about it to the unfortunate ones who were not there to cash in on the action, e.g
Girl A: I love your bag, its so nice
Girl B: *hikes bag higher onto shoulder* Thanks o, i got it on sale for 10
Girl A: *shrieks* It's a lie! 10 ke. Ah B, ur a bad friend o, and you didnt call me
Girl B: But you were writing finals that day now
Girl A: Ehen, so? I could have finished earlier

Lol! Ok maybe i exaggerated that a tad, but you catch my drift. Anyways i'm stuck here for Christmas so i plan to make the most of it. After a nice Christmas dinner with my fellow unfortunately-i'm-here-for-Christmas friends, i plan to retire to bed early, wake up promptly by 5am Boxing day and be on Oxford Circus by 6am. Yes, laugh all you want now, you wont be laughing when i'm sporting my new threads, hehehe. Plus i need the retail therapy to help me get over the depressing thoughts of missing Christmas with my family (who would be cruel enough to deny me that?)

In other news, i've been trying to get a holiday job for a while now,(all those stuff wont pay for themselves) i went for an interview at Abercrombie and Fitch yesterday and that in itself was an experience. The store is tucked away in one obscure corner and it took my friend and I, 30 minutes to find it. First there was no advertising whatsoever, my friend actually pointed out this place with a lot of people in the foyer, including one semi naked man! I was like "yeah right, does that look like a store?" How wrong was I! That was the place. We went inside and it was like a club, complete with dim lighting, loud music and tons of people and i was like "seriously?" They use models instead of mannequins which i think is pretty cool cos a mannequin cant tell you about the merchandise they're displayin plus some of those things are really scary. Anyways there were just a lot of hot, young, blonde men some of whom were missing a shirt.

I finally found the office and went for my interview. My friend and i were looking all "i'm-professional-you-should-hire-me" and everyone else was in flannel shirt and jeans. I started to feel like a royal family secretary with a stick up her ass! Honestly those people have hit the jackpot, with no media advertising whatsoever, the staff is basically it. Why spend millions on advertising when you can pay a bunch of college kids minimun wage to do it for you and it works. You shoulda seen the number of girls in that store! Lol.

Saturday, December 5, 2009

On my mind

Lately i've had a lot on my mind and today i made the desicion to stop worrying about the things i cannot change (such as other people) and change the things i can (me) Very few people understand me and even those who do, do not fully comprehend me. I like to think that i am not a complicated person, in fact i have convinced myself that i am as simple as a 5 year old's artwork and it's everyone else around me that can be likened to a Michelangelo painting, in other words my simplicity is a complexity in a world of complexity (if that makes any sense) This might end up being a bit of a rant (indulge me please)

I am this bubbly, class clown persona, the one that can mimic everyone else and make people laugh but a lot of people fail to realise that first and foremost that's not the person i am. I like to make people laugh but i am still the one that just wants to sit quietly sometimes and take in the world and those moments should not be shattered simply because you're wondering why my jester's cap is not on. I love silence and my solitude sometimes and in this crazy city the best i can get is those precious moments when i'm alone in my room. I miss Enugu (i went to law school there) The campus was huge with a lot of open spaces and trees and sometimes i would just take walks with my iPod in my ears and sing as loud as my voice would allow. It was such a release and i havent had one of those in ages.

I hate to be put in a box, i try not to put others in a box so the least i expect from others is the same. Do not friggin put me in a box. Just because i went to Unilag doesnt mean i should wear my knickers on my head and dance on table tops. Sheesh! Generalization is the worst form of ignorance i tell you and i cant stick it, i wont say i've been completely innocent of this but i make a conscious effort not to generalize.

I hate it when people think they know everything and have an opinion on everything, a suggestion for how everything should be done.

I hate it when people don't learn from their mistakes and live their lives in that vicious cycle and in seeming oblivion, I'm like "when are you going to wake up?" Don't you friggin recognize that this is the same track you've been on and it has only one destination. Short of living your life for you, i don't know what else i can do. If you want to dangle you finger over the self destruct button i choose not to be collateral damage.

So this is who i am, as my friend would say "U don see me finish, i no remain for house" No facades. Take it or facking leave it.

Wow, i feel so much better already!