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Saturday, February 20, 2010

The Last thing she said.

When i was younger, i had these friends that lived next door. The first daughter was my "best" friend at the time and she had a younger sister, their Uncle lived with them and was my brother's best friend. I was 10 when their Uncle died in the most tragic of circumstances. Back then the street i lived on was being terrorized by thieves so the boys decided to start a Vigilante group, it was fun how they would whistle to themselves and chase thieves while we would peek from the windows and talk about it the next day. One day their Uncle (Kay) heard a noise in their compound and decided to check it out, he found a man trying to break into his brother's car. The thief had a machete but Kay attacked him and overpowered him, the noise woke his brother who got out his gun and in the dark night saw a man with a machete about to strike another, he shot. And that's how Kay died. It was a really sad period, we were all devastated but i remember my friend's younger sister was more so than anyone else. You see the day he died Kay had bought stuff from Mr. Biggs and refused to give her another meatpie, in her anger she said something most of us had said once or twice. She said "eat it alone and die alone"

And he'd died that night and it broke her that that was the last thing she had said to her uncle whom she really loved. That was around 14 years ago.

Another friend of mine lost her Dad yesterday, he had been sick a while and had just returned from surgery abroad when he died. Her Dad was a really nice man, he genuinely seemed interested in what was going on with everyone of us kids that had grown up on our street. Anytime i went over to theirs he would say "Is that Neo?" It was sort of a customary greeting, one i had grown accustomed to and maybe took for granted. Like i would always go there and he would say "is that Neo?"

His death got me thinking about my own father. My father is pushing 80 and has one stroke and prostate cancer behind him. He now has a live in nurse to help take care of him and doesnt talk much these days. It's hard to see him like that cos my Dad was a strong, proud, tall man. He had the sort of personality that filled a room when he walked in. He's a chief and so when i was young i remember troops of people from the village coming to the house to ask him to settle one dispute or the other. He used to call me his GF(girlfriend) Then he got sick and everyday i felt like a part of him was slipping away and i started to slip away too. I didnt want to see him like that, weak and tired. I wanted to preserve the memories of my hero and that was how i wanted to remember him. I started to prepare myself for the day he would die, i told myself that i would be able to handle it cos sometimes it seemed he was gone and all that was left was the shell of the man he had been.

But today it just hit me, that i cant remember the last time i saw him or what he said, all i have is a vague recollection of that day. I cant remember the last thing i said to him. We're not a family that's big on I-love-yous but i want to tell my Dad that i love him and that he was a good father. He taught me one of the biggest words i knew at 5, he used to say i looked "psychedelic" each time i just had my hair done. He used to take me everywhere with him.

Right now all i want is to see my father, even if it means sitting in silence or holding his hand and making him feel as safe as he made me feel. So each morning i pray for him with a renewed fervor that God keeps him alive so that i can see him again, talk to him again.

16 comments:

onosetale(damsel) said...

Nice post, made me tear up a little..such a sad story about ur family friend's uncle and about ur dad..it really is hard seeing someone u love like that.

lani said...

I'm calling my dad 1st thing tomorrow.

Thank you

Sting said...

I hope u get to c ur dad soon. I told my dad yesterday that he better take care of himself and don't die before i finish med school so i can buy him a range rover. We were joking abt my money demanding ways.

Dark Neo said...

Wow!! Really touching post ... makes me realize how much I should enjoy my time with loved ones.

histreasure said...

oh dear, how touching..ah, that ur friend's uncle..OMG!!!

my love to ur dad...u will meet him alive and waiting to hold your hand...

Fragilelooks said...

owww its sad hw uncle kay passed. and hw bad ur friends sister felt. @ur dad: if u have d time, do visit and tel hm hw mauch he means to u.

shorty said...

This is really touching. As fragilelooks said if you chanced just try and pay your dad a visit and tell him how much you love him.

Myne Whitman said...

This life is so short, too bad about the story you shared. Please tell those you care about how you feel.

48 said...

Ah every so often we are reminded that every life, though sacred, finally does come to an end. Live, make a difference, love - while you still can. Hope you get to see your dad again.

Sumptuous said...

Sad. Makes me feel kinda guilty coz i've got a wonderful r/ship with my daddie, he turned 51 some days ago and he is the best. I pray u see ur dad soon and in good health too. xoxo

kay9 said...

Speechless.

Neo said...

thanks everyone! this means a lot
i just remembered that the last thing he said to me was "go well i will wait for u" so here's praying he does.

callin aint really an option cos he doesnt talk much on the phone...

I'm believing God that i'll see him again.

Helene said...

Wow, that's so sad about your friend's uncle. So very tragic.

I do hope you get to see your father again and tell him, in person, how much you care about him.

Original Mgbeke said...

Men this life sha, it really makes you think...
I pray that you get to see your father again, and that you get to tell him everything that you want to tell him. Hugs!

Repressed One said...

Oh wow! I'm believing with you. Here's to hoping you see him again and hail and hearty too.

muyiwa said...

Neo,its like you know whats on my mind,my dad will clock 70 this year and i must go back to naija to attend his bday cos when i was leaving he wept like a baby,its not easy oooo,may God help us